Promises Promises

Pricked by love's thorns
I decided not to love again
or at least I will not be loving
the way I have been
u know Blindly loving and only feeling what
my heart emanates
ignoring all of its guilty pleasures.
it always resonates
My mind almost tricked me into believing
it's constantly deceiving, me
Always falling for the lamest tricks
How sick
one must be to think that people
mustn't live up to one's expectations
As high as they may seem to be
 it is required to be apart of my team.
Things aren't always what they seem, so it seems
u c my heart constantly makes the same mistakes
only loving  
those that are emotionally unavailable
and for some strange
reason i choose to love them with no eyes
all cus that feelin on the inside
keepin me content
well it used to
Relationships should be fruitful
Until time reveals the truthful and I begin
to despise the real deal about
who they were didn't reflect on the outside
finally realizing their intent
I sit and realize all the wasted time spent


And Vow not to do it again...

I know nothing

I have learned in life
 that i truly know nothing...
At one point that nothing what i thought
was something (it really wasn't )
was my everything!
Only to be startled by the harsh reality of life
showing me the consequences of  the choices
I chose
you chose
we all chose
different choices
which directly impacted on each and everyone's life.
Sometimes i think how selfish of me not to take consideration on the impact
of my actions on he and the world.
I at least owe the world that respect
Then I reflected on me being that person that was more concerned about saving the world
rather than saving me.
A martyr I'm not
I opted to take another path
I was out
of that game.
I still remember their names.
How the aged ones laughed with great vigor
u know that I toldja so look on their face
But being so curious
You had to find the better path
u know the one that I finally took
I guess that's why in all of the wrong paths in my travels
I needed to learn which i did
survival to the fittest.
At an early age we learn how to defend self but do we learn at what cost
is that self defended?
That is the question that should of been asked and wasn't
Everybody wants to be a boss even me of course
I even lost my sense of self in the process
I almost became heartless in life but anytime I was that close to losing me
Someone
was there putting up that fight in the name of Love
Everything changes in life
Life of a Venusian somehow something or someone seems to always takes my heart back
from the point of no return
And I am continuing to learn that
One thing I did learn is
when I think I know something I always find out that... I knew not.

love don't live here anymore... =(

Heart be still
what time reveals
often to our dismay
everything you pray or prey on
is not what is seems
What the dreams didn't reveal
real life has a way of doing so
u see the halo
turns to horns
realizing i was forlorn
i begin to pick up the pieces to
the puzzle that was torn apart in my mind
thought u were one of a kind
realized u are just like all the rest
my heart protests what your very
mouth confessed
surely u jest
however i know the truth is in the joke
my heart has become the laughing stock of my mind
once again
because it knew how this story was going to end
but my heart blinded by love thought what was
wasn't really what it seemed
it seems like my life has been themed
no longer excited due to love sometimes being unrequited
I have decided to stand alone.
even though my heart aches and is in need of repair
i will not despair
Moving on is all I can do
biggest mistake is loving you so hard
had i not i wouldn't feel so scarred
right now
As i bow out gracefully
no longer wondering aimlessly
as my heart painfully
puts up a sign of no vacancy
cus love don't live here anymore and I'm
not sure if it will ever be welcome again.
Hearts can even be broken by "friends".

Broken Again - Hil St. Soul

the way u make me feel....

Feeling blessed 
reawakened and alive
no long feeling dead on the inside
he kissed me with the  kiss of life
and now i am feeling everything will be all right
i feel so free from all of those things
that were holding me back
realizing that their was nothing i ever lacked
ignited the flame within
 inspired me to be the best i could be
although i was already flying high 
made me realize that this was only the beginning of the ride
life isn't over it only just begun
so i stopped crying like all has been said and done
no reason to despair, i will always be there 
as you can see is what he said to me
And i just smiled and realized that what
was said is true.
 That's why I will always care for you.
Time distance and space can't keep us apart
i guess that's why your name is tatted on my heart
Even if we ever have to part ways
i will love u always
 Always -Pebbles